When church is like an ABC documentary

When surveyed about what should be on television, most people say they want more documentaries. The ABC has certainly complied with this wish, giving us documentaries on every conceivable (and inconceivable) subject. We have wandered the art world of Europe, the reproductive cycle of the ant, the history of dance, and the wonders of the cosmos. We have delved into the history of war and the history of love, the history of science, even the history of Christianity.

The strange thing is, nobody actually watches ABC documentaries. Their ratings are very poor. We all seem to want more of them on television, but not many of us tune in. Perhaps, confused at having five channels to choose from, people want to limit their effective choice to four. Lamentable though the fact might be, when most people flop in front of the tube, they simply want to be entertained, not educated.

The same is true in other areas. How many people object to McDonald’s and yet eat it when in a rush? How many people call for great literature to be studied in schools while reading cheap whodunnits themselves?

So it is with church. Church is an idealistic establishment. People see it as a place that should be there for the important moments of life, like death—a place that should provide moral leadership and teaching, especially for children—a place that should uphold old-fashioned values (even if we do not believe in them anymore) and preserve old buildings and even older rites and practices—a place that should be the same as it was when we were children 30, 40, 70 years ago—a place of stability in a world of change, holding together the fabric of our disintegrating society and giving solace to those unable to cope with it. As Sir Humphrey Appleby so eloquently put it, “No-one actually goes to the Church of England; but they like to know it’s there”.

Church is a place of these kind of ideals—a place where nobody goes. It is as boring as an ABC documentary—highly approved of but highly uninteresting. Afterwards, you may feel good for having gone, but there’s little enticement to return next week. At least with the ABC, next week’s programme promises to be different.

Like it or not, our society does not want to be educated, built up in its knowledge, refined in its values; it wants to be entertained. And church is as entertaining as watching a pumpkin grow. Even more boring than watching pumpkins grow is watching an ABC religious documentary. It is almost impossible to gauge the boredom these programmes induce, as I have yet to meet anyone who has stayed awake all the way through.

Would it ever be possible to make church entertaining? Would we want it to be entertaining? Perhaps it would be better to let it die through lack of funds (like the ABC) and set up an alternative which people might find enjoyable …

Would it be a crime to make Christianity entertaining?

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